GD IT

Whenever I can't remember where something funny came from, and when my brother doesn't know either (he has the movie/tv-quote/song-lyric memory of a FOX. (A fox with a REALLY REALLY good memory who seems to know every movie/tv show/song EVER), I figure that Gus Gus was having a really good day that day, and I give him a little treat in his food box.

Well, it was fate that I kept putting off this post until now because I discovered that it was not my mere genius from whence thus phrase came, but it actually came from another much post-worthy brain of awesomeness, a one Liam Sullivan. [If you don't want to check the mastery of awesome that Liam is right now, I will post about him in the future].

Anyway, due to my obscene laziness, I not only need to lessen my energy output through my actions, but also through the number of words I say. [This may seem to be in direct conflict with my previous post where I said I like to talk a lot and loudly... well... SHUT UP. [This doesn't really serve to make me say less or really restrict any energy output, but it's AWESOME SO THAT'S ALL THAT MATTERS]].

Back to what I was saying, I, and my friends, now reduce the amount of syllables we say, and actually, the number of swears we swear, through this convenient, and catchy, method:

GFD  IT
(see emphasis rules below, this stands for God Fabulous(!) Damn It).

Or my personal favorite:

JFC!!!!
(I think you can figure it out...) 

So the emphasis is sort of complicated... its sort of a regular emphasis on the first letter, an under-emphasis on the second letter, and an over-emphasis on the third letter. If I had my audio blog I could demonstrate... JFC!!!!

Don't forget the widely popular FML. And of course the 'brb', 'omg', 'lsd' of the internet age.




Not only is it "hip" but it also is a great compromise between you and your religious friends, because technically, you aren't taking our lord and savior's name in vain, just some dumb letters.... that happen to stand for our lord and savior's name... in vain.

Also acceptable is "Jeezy Creezy." It's not blasphemous because it's funny.

But, as I mentioned above, I truly believe that my excessive use of GD was actually... borrowed... from Liam Sullivan in Text Message Breakup, which I just happened to watch last night, mere moments before I began writing this blog. [CONSPIRACY?!?!?!??!]


Along these lines is the ever-popular "mixing of curse levels" such as 'gosh darn fucker,' but this can be difficult to perfect.  [Note: I didn't come up with this. One of my friends introduced me to it. I don't know where he/she/it got it from. But it definitely wasn't his/her/it's brain.]

But back up to the
GFD and JFC.

If you have 'morals' but still get angry, I've got a solution for you!

You can now spell three letter words that describe cute/cuddly/delicious/awesome things with the same emphasis on the third letter, such as:

caT!
or
buN!
or
beD!

But if you need more meaning behind your three-letter word, try:

geD
(this is so dumb/lame, someone with their GED could do it)

flU
(i hate you so much i hope you get sick)

buG
(you really bug me or ew! a bug!)

faT
(man, you're fat)

eaR
(the sound of your voice makes me wish i was deaf)

fuN
(i'm having fun but for some reason im angry about it!)

haM
(ham is delicious but is a complete sidenote!)

You can come up with your own!


And on the subject of language, let me re-introduce my brother. My brother and I are basically the same person, a set of identical twins with un-identical body parts/brains/thoughts/feelings, who were birthed three years apart, but with some thoughts/feelings/ideas in common, that may just be attributed to growing up together. Anyway, like any set of identical twins, we have begun, in our early twenties, to develop our own "twin-language" which no one else knows or understands. The problem with this however, is that everyone understands it and, aiming to be as cool as we are, "takes it as their own." Thus, we are required to constantly evolve our language.

One problem we encounter is that our Mom tries to stay "hip with the latest trends" by adopting our language. [Sidenote: when I say "our" language, I really mean my brother don't speak no good and when funny things come out of his mouth I copy them and claim them as "ours".] For example, we have had to evolve what we call our Gram:

Grandma
Gramsie
G-ram
Gram
Gram Gram
G-town
Etc.

[Further sidenote: And sometimes, his evolution just doesn't suit me, and so I don't recognize said evolution. Ex. Nick moved on to "Gram Gram" which I harbor ill will against, so I continue to call Gram, 'Gram' or 'G-town.']



I think I'm going to start calling her G-Train. Yeah. I like the sound of that. Then I will make a train noise. Then I will get her to act like a train!!!! [VIDEOS TO FOLLOW AS SOON AS I SEE HER].

Further words from our "language":

The Weg (Wegmans)
The Block (Blockbuster)
Scrabb or Scrabbs (Scrabble)
Blok (Blokus)
Don (donut, pronounced like "dome" but with an n)
Def (definitely)
Ridic (ridiculous)

The Simps (The Simpsons)

It's much cooler in actual use...

Basically, you just take the first syllable from the word. AND IT'S COOL.Ya dig? [<-- stolen from Nick].