I have a better idea:
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
You're In
So I had to get a drug test for a possible new job. When I was there, the person told me that typically, companies test your urine for five categories of drugs including marijuana, cocaine, amphetamines, and two others... Anyway, I had a great idea (per usual). Typically, the place will call you if your test is positive. Well, you know how some doctors send you nice little "reminder postcards" when you have an upcoming appointment?
I have a better idea:
I have a better idea:
Sunday, January 23, 2011
Update: The Post Office... OF EVIL!!!
SO.
I went to the Post Office to get my $18.30 that they owed me for not delivering the whos-it-whats-it to Arkansas last week. Well, for those of you who don't know (MOM), when you go to the Post Office here, you have to pay the meter for parking. Now, I also overestimate how long its going to take, even when it so happens that the line is nine years long, but this time, I figured, it won't take that long. Still, I put in 25 minutes worth of quarters. JUST TO BE SAFE. Well, I went into the Post Office, and the line was really short, only 3 people ahead of me - hurrah!
So I get up to the counter, and I tell the Mr. Man what's up. I, of course, printed out the delivery notice from the internet, had my receipt and the thingy-mc-doody for having mailed the package two-day. Mr. Man takes all of the things (I noticed his name tag said "Cinco cinco." No, he wasn't hispanic.) and has to go talk to his boss.
He eventually comes back and tells me that the delivery notices that the Arkansas Post Office posted are "weird" and he doesn't know what it means. BUT, he proceeds to explain to me like I didn't just graduate with honors in Astrophysics that the package DID arrive in Fayetteville, Arkansas by the guaranteed delivery date. I wasn't convinced, but since it had been like 24.9 minutes, I told him I had to go put more money in the meter and I would be back. He left again.
He didn't come back for a while. I saw him come into the front area on the opposite side of where I was standing, and it looked like he grabbed a phone book.
He comes back and proceeds to explain to me how schools pick up their mail - instead of signing for each piece of mail, they sign a ledger that lists every piece so that they only have to sign once. Again, he practically drew me a picture like I was going to become a future postman.
He leaves again.
It's nearing 40 minutes that I've been standing there, and he comes back. He explains to me that the package was there at the guaranteed time, but someone just didn't scan it correctly. I was ready to hear, "So... bye!" but he said he would give me my money back because the delivery notices were "confusing."
After he left again to get someone to help him hit the "cash" button on the computer, he gave me $0.50 extra because "it shouldn't have taken that long."
Oh, I also had to sign some forms up in there. And I signed a form that said I got my money BEFORE I got my money. That was risky.
So, the guy was nice. But 45 minutes?!?! GEEZ. Eh, I didn't have anything better to do.
I went to the Post Office to get my $18.30 that they owed me for not delivering the whos-it-whats-it to Arkansas last week. Well, for those of you who don't know (MOM), when you go to the Post Office here, you have to pay the meter for parking. Now, I also overestimate how long its going to take, even when it so happens that the line is nine years long, but this time, I figured, it won't take that long. Still, I put in 25 minutes worth of quarters. JUST TO BE SAFE. Well, I went into the Post Office, and the line was really short, only 3 people ahead of me - hurrah!
So I get up to the counter, and I tell the Mr. Man what's up. I, of course, printed out the delivery notice from the internet, had my receipt and the thingy-mc-doody for having mailed the package two-day. Mr. Man takes all of the things (I noticed his name tag said "Cinco cinco." No, he wasn't hispanic.) and has to go talk to his boss.
He eventually comes back and tells me that the delivery notices that the Arkansas Post Office posted are "weird" and he doesn't know what it means. BUT, he proceeds to explain to me like I didn't just graduate with honors in Astrophysics that the package DID arrive in Fayetteville, Arkansas by the guaranteed delivery date. I wasn't convinced, but since it had been like 24.9 minutes, I told him I had to go put more money in the meter and I would be back. He left again.
He didn't come back for a while. I saw him come into the front area on the opposite side of where I was standing, and it looked like he grabbed a phone book.
He comes back and proceeds to explain to me how schools pick up their mail - instead of signing for each piece of mail, they sign a ledger that lists every piece so that they only have to sign once. Again, he practically drew me a picture like I was going to become a future postman.
He leaves again.
It's nearing 40 minutes that I've been standing there, and he comes back. He explains to me that the package was there at the guaranteed time, but someone just didn't scan it correctly. I was ready to hear, "So... bye!" but he said he would give me my money back because the delivery notices were "confusing."
After he left again to get someone to help him hit the "cash" button on the computer, he gave me $0.50 extra because "it shouldn't have taken that long."
Oh, I also had to sign some forms up in there. And I signed a form that said I got my money BEFORE I got my money. That was risky.
So, the guy was nice. But 45 minutes?!?! GEEZ. Eh, I didn't have anything better to do.
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Book Review: Water For Elephants
Hiya Kids!
Here is another book review. I just finished Water for Elephants by Sara Gruen. Well, it took be a little more than half of the book to really get into it. But then I liked it, and wanted to know what happened next. I'd say the last hundred pages were the best and were can't-put-the-book-down-worthy. Anyway, the preview for the movie looks really good, even though it has a glittery vampire in it. But he smiles! So. I'll see the movie probably. And I do recommend the book.
Here is another book review. I just finished Water for Elephants by Sara Gruen. Well, it took be a little more than half of the book to really get into it. But then I liked it, and wanted to know what happened next. I'd say the last hundred pages were the best and were can't-put-the-book-down-worthy. Anyway, the preview for the movie looks really good, even though it has a glittery vampire in it. But he smiles! So. I'll see the movie probably. And I do recommend the book.
Paranoi-uh????
Well, I thought it was just me getting older but I have noticed a heightened sense of paranoia on my part. I haven't gotten Grandma-bad, where if I lose something, the only reasonable explanation is that someone broke in and took the one, single thing I am missing and didn't take anything of real value. [But only because I don't lose things... yet...] But I have grown increasingly suspicious of EVERYONE ELSE IN THE WORLD and their INABILITY TO DO ANYTHING.
As such, I've done squinty eyes towards the POST OFFICE.
Sorta like this:
Fuckin' post office... am I right?
Well anyway, my paranoia has been completely legitimate. And I'll tell you all about it. So firstly, I've grown leery of the post office simply because I don't trust them to do their job and get my VITAL MAILING to where it needs to go. And anything I send is vital. Well, it's true! [Both that everything I send is vital and that they won't do their job].
So, when I am in New York for Christmas, I get SO MANY awesome presents, and the airlines are COMPLETE D-BAGS so I end up having to mail presents home. Well, I had some boxes and so I packed up two boxes: one was full of scrapbooking things like scissors and markers and paper and it also had three books I got for Christmas in it. The other box had other stuff. Now, I'm not retardy - I know how to tape up a box to get it ready for to be mailed - AND since I'm all leery of them, I make sure its strong and sturdy. Now, despite my leeriness, I'm not gonna pay extra for THEM TO DO THEIR JOB and get "insurance" that they won't destroy my package that I have strongholded (strongheld?) with tape.
WELL, YOU GOT ME MR. POST OFFICE MAN!
Well, the package that I sent from myself in NY to myself in CO, the one I described above, arrived to be in Colorado IN PIECES. Mainly, it was missing one side of the box, and there was... maybe a few markers in it. None of the books. And I hope there was nothing else important, otherwise, it's gone now! So THAT was awesome. I went to the Post Office here in Colorado and asked about it, if there was anything I could do... well no! Of course not! The lady did give me a number of a section at a different Post Office called the "Nixie" Section that houses items that fall out of packages [I bet it's just the back of some guy's truck... which he empties into his house...]. Well, I called at least once a day (sometimes twice) for a week and there was NEVER anyone in the section. NEAT. Oh well.
"Okay, so that is one incident during the holidays, blah blah blah," you say. WELL! Do I have news for you!?!?
No, but really, do I?
I do.
This past month has been "Send in Your Graduate Applications" Month. For the LOSER schools that don't accept online applications or where I need to send extra documents in PAPER-FORM, I get to spend $18 to ship the application next-day. So I went to the Post Office last Thursday, and I needed the package to get to Arkansas (I know, I know...) by Saturday. Now, for some reason they didn't have next-day service, but they had two-day service, and it was supposed to get to Arkansas by 3pm. HA!
Well, just have a look:
Now, I hope that Postman got overtime for the three-day journey he took between January 15th and January 18th.
I mean, really????
Now, this is JUST what I need. To have my paranoid delusions COME TRUE!
As such, I think it's just safe to say that ALL of my paranoid delusions are...
NOT DELUSIONS AT ALL.
DUM DUM DUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
[Yes, this includes my fantasies surrounding my relationships, Tahlia.]
Now I have to go the Post Office and get my $18 back. Seriously, I go there like every week.
As such, I've done squinty eyes towards the POST OFFICE.
Sorta like this:
Fuckin' post office... am I right?
Well anyway, my paranoia has been completely legitimate. And I'll tell you all about it. So firstly, I've grown leery of the post office simply because I don't trust them to do their job and get my VITAL MAILING to where it needs to go. And anything I send is vital. Well, it's true! [Both that everything I send is vital and that they won't do their job].
So, when I am in New York for Christmas, I get SO MANY awesome presents, and the airlines are COMPLETE D-BAGS so I end up having to mail presents home. Well, I had some boxes and so I packed up two boxes: one was full of scrapbooking things like scissors and markers and paper and it also had three books I got for Christmas in it. The other box had other stuff. Now, I'm not retardy - I know how to tape up a box to get it ready for to be mailed - AND since I'm all leery of them, I make sure its strong and sturdy. Now, despite my leeriness, I'm not gonna pay extra for THEM TO DO THEIR JOB and get "insurance" that they won't destroy my package that I have strongholded (strongheld?) with tape.
WELL, YOU GOT ME MR. POST OFFICE MAN!
Yep, this guy.
"Okay, so that is one incident during the holidays, blah blah blah," you say. WELL! Do I have news for you!?!?
No, but really, do I?
I do.
This past month has been "Send in Your Graduate Applications" Month. For the LOSER schools that don't accept online applications or where I need to send extra documents in PAPER-FORM, I get to spend $18 to ship the application next-day. So I went to the Post Office last Thursday, and I needed the package to get to Arkansas (I know, I know...) by Saturday. Now, for some reason they didn't have next-day service, but they had two-day service, and it was supposed to get to Arkansas by 3pm. HA!
Well, just have a look:
Now, I hope that Postman got overtime for the three-day journey he took between January 15th and January 18th.
I mean, really????
Now, this is JUST what I need. To have my paranoid delusions COME TRUE!
As such, I think it's just safe to say that ALL of my paranoid delusions are...
NOT DELUSIONS AT ALL.
DUM DUM DUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
[Yes, this includes my fantasies surrounding my relationships, Tahlia.]
Now I have to go the Post Office and get my $18 back. Seriously, I go there like every week.
Monday, January 17, 2011
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Ok, One More...
So I am also hoping this comic plays into my New Year... If you catch my drift... (There are many drifts to be caught).
CATCH IT!
CATCH IT!
Survive New Year!
So I know this is sort of... untimely. But one of the comics I read is Cyanide and Happiness and I was just catching up and this comic totally represents my previous post on "Happy" New Year :)
Survive New Year!
Survive New Year!
Saturday, January 8, 2011
InsomniAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
Well I was hoping that once I had gradumacated and gotten my grad school essays written, that my insomnia would subside. I had inklings of hope whilst in NY when I was surprisingly able to get to sleep by 3am-ish NY time (which would be 1am-ish CO time - whoa!). And this was even in the frigid-death-cave that was the room I stayed in at my Gram's! Alas, 'twas not meant to be.
Currently, even WITH sleeping aids, and not taking naps during the day, I sleep *maybe* two hours a night, unrestful, etc. BLEH. I'm dying here people.
Well, I think I'm just gonna accept the fact that I will never again sleep at night, and just go with it. What other choice do I have, really? I'll get in bed around 1am, I'll lay there for a few hours, then I'll get up and BLOG ABOUT IT. I like the sound of that! And I mean, as long as I don't have a headache, I'm not doing too bad. I can't wait for the day when I "accidentally" shove my arm down the bagel slicer at work and whoopsiedoodle! It'll take me SO much longer to blog.
BUT this is the moment I've REALLY been waiting for. (And you too, I'm sure).
So at my like, what was it, 48th birthday this past year, my AWESOME friend got me these AWESOME gifts. Well, I was ecstatic to use them, AND BLOG ABOUT IT, but I didn't want to give it some half-assed post, and so I've been waiting for the moment to arise when I sit up in bed, put my glasses on only to seductively remove them in a, "By God! It's time!" sort of way.
Well, I'd just like you to know that I have written this ENTIRE POST with the none-other than my blog-assisting friends, THE PARTY RATS!!!
You'll notice it says right on the package that they are, and I quote, Ideal for NIGHT BLOGGING. And ideal they are.
Look at the blogaction (one word, say it out loud - blogaction (blah GAK shun)) occurring RIGHT NOW!
It almost makes them... dare I say it?... IDEAL FOR NIGHT-BLOGGING!!!!!!
I have yet to name my furry blog-assisting friends... but they'll be good.
I'd also like to bring attention to the two uses for Party Rats: raves and night-blogging.
DON'T FORGET BUZCO!
Currently, even WITH sleeping aids, and not taking naps during the day, I sleep *maybe* two hours a night, unrestful, etc. BLEH. I'm dying here people.
Well, I think I'm just gonna accept the fact that I will never again sleep at night, and just go with it. What other choice do I have, really? I'll get in bed around 1am, I'll lay there for a few hours, then I'll get up and BLOG ABOUT IT. I like the sound of that! And I mean, as long as I don't have a headache, I'm not doing too bad. I can't wait for the day when I "accidentally" shove my arm down the bagel slicer at work and whoopsiedoodle! It'll take me SO much longer to blog.
BUT this is the moment I've REALLY been waiting for. (And you too, I'm sure).
So at my like, what was it, 48th birthday this past year, my AWESOME friend got me these AWESOME gifts. Well, I was ecstatic to use them, AND BLOG ABOUT IT, but I didn't want to give it some half-assed post, and so I've been waiting for the moment to arise when I sit up in bed, put my glasses on only to seductively remove them in a, "By God! It's time!" sort of way.
Well, I'd just like you to know that I have written this ENTIRE POST with the none-other than my blog-assisting friends, THE PARTY RATS!!!
You'll notice it says right on the package that they are, and I quote, Ideal for NIGHT BLOGGING. And ideal they are.
Look at the blogaction (one word, say it out loud - blogaction (blah GAK shun)) occurring RIGHT NOW!
You'll also notice these Party Rats, as it were, have super night-blogging laser-eye action (action action action action).
It almost makes them... dare I say it?... IDEAL FOR NIGHT-BLOGGING!!!!!!
I'd also like to bring attention to the two uses for Party Rats: raves and night-blogging.
DON'T FORGET BUZCO!
Photo courtesy of Buzco La Perra Verdenegra
Friday, January 7, 2011
Book Review!
I know.
My blog's getting a little too serious these days, am I right? Well, I figure with ALL THE FREE TIME I NOW HAVE, I better step up the blogs, and thus, I'm gonna blog your world. WITH WHATEVER I WANT.
So since I'm all leisure-reading now, and not stupid-textbook-reading, hurrah!, I'll tell you what I think of the books I'm reading and YOU WILL THINK IT TOO.
The last book I read was The Corrections by Jonathan Franzen. It's about a family, and it's really good. I highly recommend it. He uses big words and it's a bit over my head, and some parts I'm like, "what?" so I just skipped it, but after you get halfway through the book, I REALLY REALLY started to like it.
I don't want to give anything away, so I'll just tell you that it's about a mid-western family - two parents and their three grown children, who moved away. Long story short, it's good. Read it.
My blog's getting a little too serious these days, am I right? Well, I figure with ALL THE FREE TIME I NOW HAVE, I better step up the blogs, and thus, I'm gonna blog your world. WITH WHATEVER I WANT.
So since I'm all leisure-reading now, and not stupid-textbook-reading, hurrah!, I'll tell you what I think of the books I'm reading and YOU WILL THINK IT TOO.
The last book I read was The Corrections by Jonathan Franzen. It's about a family, and it's really good. I highly recommend it. He uses big words and it's a bit over my head, and some parts I'm like, "what?" so I just skipped it, but after you get halfway through the book, I REALLY REALLY started to like it.
I don't want to give anything away, so I'll just tell you that it's about a mid-western family - two parents and their three grown children, who moved away. Long story short, it's good. Read it.
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