Dora, I Wanna Explore Ya

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In tune with my genetic predisposition to pedophilia, I often "research" what the kids are into these days. My time spent perusing the schoolyard led to my discovery of a one, um, Dora, as she's known. Apparently, she's an Explorer.


;)



Anyway, for all of you subject to the running-of-pedophilia-in-your-family, but who also have problems with romance and passion in the bedroom (all of you), here is a surefire way to spice things up:

Below is a transcript of one of my previous love-making sessions (Yes, I do secretly record all of them. Why do you ask?). Anyway, the following is guaranteed to have all the ladies tearing at your belt buckle with the fierce passion of pure lust. Happens to me anyway.

Me: Mmmmm, baby, mmmm....
Lady: Oh yeah, mmmm...
[Stop. Gaze lustfully into their eyes.]
Me: Dora, I wanna explore ya...
Lady: OH BECCA!!!!!!!!! THE MOST GLORIOUS RAINBOW EVER!!!! DO ME ON IT!!!!!
Me: Call me Boots...

End scene.

If that doesn't work for you, then... I'm sorry you're so ugly.

A SIDE-POST EXTRAVAGANZA FOR YOU!

As I was Googling Dora, I was thinking about what kind of sweet pictures I could use to augment my post. So after the Googling, I Googled "slut Dora." Well, APPARENTLY, I have another NON-original idea. I seem to be chock full of those lately (see Ants Built the Pyramids).

There are literally billions of articles about how gd* GOOD "grown-up Dora" looks, but Alas! and HideNSneek have the best synopses (and the best pictures, but I didn't want to post them for fear of "plagiarism" or whatever that is. I think it's just something someone unwitty came up with).

Or you could just Google "slut Dora" after you... you know.

*explanatory post in the works