The Cryptkeeper

As many of you know, I was visiting family in NY this weekend, among them my Gram and my brother, Nick. The first couple days ended up being uneventful in terms of those priceless gems known as videos and quotes. But the last couple days… PURE BLOG GOLD. For example, as everyone knows, old people don’t have teeth. They get expensive fake teeth plucked from the mouths of babes that could have paid off ¼ of my student loans. As such, when they go to bed, they take out these hindrances, if only to scare the heck out of their grandchildren. As it happened, my brother and I were watching It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, when my grandma comes into the room, after having gotten ready for bed. She says something to my brother in her toothless glory and Nick yells, “AHHHHHH!!! THE CRYPTKEEPER!!!” I died laughing.

Now, because you weren’t there, you might not currently be crippled with both bloodcurdling terror and sheer, unadulterated laughter. Thus, I have commissioned my brother to provide you with the terrifying rendition that is The Cryptkeeper:

I do have one more hilarious/terrifying anecdote. Nick and my Gram were in the room I was staying in and I was in the kitchen, but I could hear them. Gram was scratching Nick’s back, as it is one of her top five duties. On the floor in that room was a book I brought with me from CO in case I decided to learn how to read. The book was “The Hot Zone” by Richard Preston about viruses or something (I haven’t read it). The story goes like this:

Gram (to Nick): You should read that book The Hot Zone.

[Pause]

Gram: It sounds sexy!

Nick turns to look at her and this is what he gets:

I’m sorry if you can’t sleep tonight out of utter fear. I wish I could present you with the real deal, but after hearing about her Robot fame, Gram has decided to retire from the limelight that is my blog, at least in video form…. for now.